This is to inform reader’s that this article re-published online was used in the book – Silver Lining by Godwin 3ple-i (http://bookstore.authorhouse.com/Products/SKU-000602511/Silver-Lining.aspx) with written permission form the author. Thank you
The Girl in My College by DD Phil
Love. What is it? The sweet sayings? The kisses? The romance? Or maybe the sex? No; it is not in any of these! And mind you, it is not deceit either. Or promises made and not kept. Yes. I call it sincerity and understanding.
There are girls and there are girls. Or I should say, there are women and there are women, for not all women are alike. Some are good while others are bad. Some are there to shorten men’s life-spans, while are not. I know of a woman who signed a divorce note which eventually led to her husband’s committing suicide. Pity him.
I have never seen anyone as pretty as the girl in my college. No. Not in my life. No girl can compare with her. Very intelligent. Modest in her dressing. Having the look of an innocent girl who has never known any evil. Maybe I should call her an ‘angel’, but I know angels do not fall down to date men on earth. It has never happened in history and would not happen in the future. Not because men are evil, but because the world is corrupt. I would have loved to date an angel – maybe that would prolong my life-span. But I wonder if angels still deign to tread on earth.
Her character radiates the inner beauty of a good future house-wife. She is a girl every man would like to date. I’ve never considered it for once that I would like to date a girl at my young age.
Shy. Confused. That is exactly the way I felt every time I asked her to come and see me. And each time, I blame myself after she leaves my room in the hostel. I never knew how to tell her that I loved her. I always ask myself a question in order to delay my approaching her. What if she has a guy dating her? What will be her response to me? And if not, I should be quick to ask her out, for I knew what pride it would bring me if she eventually agreed to be mine. My time at the college would have ended up in the loss of my life — cultists and lecturers were desperate to have her. But thank God, I did not die!
My heart sang for joy when she said ‘yes’ to my proposal. I felt like giving her a hug and a kiss to express my joy to her. In fact it was the happiest day of my life. At the moment I felt the world had come to stay under my feet.
I stood, staring at her with great passion. We had the hope that one day, we would still get married. Oh, what a great dream! That was what I had always wanted as a young man. To get a girl who would make me feel proud. They called us the best couple on campus. Everyone envied us. We constantly enjoyed our fabulous time together, taking good care of each other. She was a girl that I really enjoyed having a relationship with. We hanged out together most of the time. In fact, it was fun and romantic. If every relationship could be like that, then there would be no need for separation and divorce. I hate those words. I wish I could have those words erased out of my dictionary.
It was not as easy as I thought, to disclose it to my parents. Everyone, including my relatives, advised me to be careful in the relationship. Especially my mom who never wanted anyone to hurt my feelings. My friends got angry each time they saw both of us together. I took it to be jealousy.
Did the relationship last? No. Only for a short period. Not even up to a year. We began to have problems and misunderstandings with each other. I couldn’t understand her any more. Her speech and her character changed. And she started dressing like a woman of easy virtue. Her beauty began to wither away like the petals of a fading flower whose stems and roots couldn’t absorb water and nutrients from the soil anymore. Everyone complained about her. And I tried each time to caution and advise her, but she wouldn’t listen. Her stubbornness worsened. One thing I could remember hearing her say is: ‘This is me. This is my nature.’
Forty-eight hours after regaining my consciousness from an accident that almost took my life away, I visited her again with a friend who decided to accompany me to the campus. Seeing me limping like a disabled fellow, she ignored me, not even bothering or caring enough to enquire what was wrong with me.
I felt the emotional pain of this deeply. Tears gushed out shamelessly from my eyes like a little child who was denied access to breast milk by his mother. Hoping desperately that she was going to reverse her decision of quitting the relationship, she looked into my eyeballs, stretched her right hand and handed me something. But behold, it was a ring — the engagement ring that I had earlier given to her — that was what I saw in my palm. Not knowing what to say, I wiped off the tears from my eyes. She looked at me again as one without feelings at all, telling me, ‘It is over’. I shut my eyes for a few seconds, thinking of what to say before she leaves. But before long, she was gone. Walking majestically. Like an
Love. I’ve known what it is. Maybe it is just a disguise. Or a game of chance. I don’t want to play games with it. I’m scared to love another, because it almost ruined my life. I don’t want to meet another lady who would ruin my life, but one that would support me and take good care of me as my mother does. And one that will be like an ‘angel’ to me. One that will take me for who I am and not for what I am not. One that will look straight into my eyes and tell me she loves me too after I might have said the same thing to her. I need a girl who will walk side by side with me and not be ashamed. One who, when I look into her eyes, would bring peace to my soul. One who will live in peace and harmony with me when I get married to her. One who will help lengthen my life-span, not shorten it. One who will lift me up when I’m down. One who will nurse me back to robust health when I’m ill.
I do not want a girl who will think of separation or divorce when little things go wrong. Like the girl in my college. No. I do not want her.